This has, personally, been a very difficult week for me. And, I allowed it (to be completely honest and transparent) to steal my joy. I have spent a lot of time in tears, and questioning God's path for my life, and in prayer. I have felt sorry for myself. Beyond that....I have pretty much wallowed in self pity. Woe is me....why did this happen...whaaa whaaa whaaa.
This morning, before getting all of us ready for Church, I was sitting in my chair watching my 2 precious girls play together (17 mos and 12 mos). They were laughing and playing, and joy was just pouring out of them. The 17 mo old has been with me almsot a year. Her bio mom is Bi polar, and would terrify this precious baby when she would transition into a manic phase. The 12 mo old has only been with me for 2 months, and came to me burned, and having never connected/bonded with her bio mom. Yet, these 2 little girls can find the smallest things to just DOUBLE over in laughter about. They smile at the simplest things. They look at me, and just BEAM with joy. If anyone has the right (not sure if this is the correct word, but its the best I can come up with right now) to wallow in self pity, to question WHY their life has gone this way, to spend hours in tears......these 2 girls have it! But, no......they choose to look at me, their "parent", their care giver, the person whose job it is to keep them safe.....and KNOW beyond any shadow of a doubt that I have their best interest at heart. That I am going to always do what is best for them. That I will not allow any one/thing hurt them.
Why then, do I not remember to look at my Heavenly Father with that same trust and faith??? What a wonderful way God chose to remind me of this fact. No matter what happens in my life....He is my Father. He will keep me safe. He has my best interest at heart. He is always going to do what is best for me. And, while there are things I allow to hurt me......I have allowed this pain because I am not trusting 100% in His plan for my life. He will never leave me nor forsake me.
The joy of The Lord is my stregnth! And, The Lord watches over ALL His children. Some He entrusts to me for a while, but He is always watching over them and showing them His joy! Oh, to have their innocence! Oh, to have their ability to trust completely! Oh, to remember that the joy of The Lord is MY strength!
Thank you, Father, for this reminder. For allowing me to see their joy.
AMEN!!!
ReplyDeleteThank you :-)
DeleteThank you for posting this. As a prospective foster mother, as well believer of Christ, this really touched me. I also feel it is my calling to care for these children (in foster care). Very encouraging!
ReplyDeleteWonderful! I'll keep you in my prayers
DeleteThank you so much. I'm 40, single and in the process of being licensed. I know God is calling me to it, and yet I cry tears every time I consider this journey, both for the hurting children out there and in fear of doing this alone. Your reminder of all being is Gods hands, and all being well resonates. I thank you.
ReplyDeleteI too am being called by God to be a single foster parent. It's very exciting. But I have moments of doubt also. I'm so glad I found your blog. Please post more.
ReplyDeleteI too am being called by God to be a single foster parent. It's very exciting. But I have moments of doubt also. I'm so glad I found your blog. Please post more.
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